Deceiving Looks
Crimebot studied Zero Caspian's handsome face. He did not know what to make of this stranger who had apparently not only hunted them down in one of the most remote wildernesses Crimebot had ever step foot it, but had also correctly anticipated their next move and had headed them off, seemingly with some time to spare.
He opened his robotic mouth to speak, but was cut off by Zero Caspian. "Please, fair robot," said Zero Caspian, "I know you have many questions. Let me just say this, and then we shall say no more: I have come from a faraway land to help you, so that one day many days from now, you will be able to help me. The object you seek is an important artefact indeed, and one that will perhaps even save the very world we live on!" Crimebot attempted to speak again, but again Zero cut him off, "No more, time is crucial! Foul beasts live in these woods, and we must hurry out of them. Your question and/or comments would only slow us down!" and with that, he leapt to his feet and walked briskly over to the edge of the glade they were in. If I didn't mention they were in a glade earlier, they are.
Or were, technically, as now they quickly moved away from it down a narrow path. Crimebot had lost the set of tracks he was following when he had become entraced by Zero Caspian's beautiful singing voice, and so now he was following the tall half-elf quickly with Ross a half-step behind.
Just then, they came to an abrupt halt. "Wait," said Zero Caspian, "I smell danger!"
"I do not sense any danger," said Crimebot, unable to sense any danger.
"Look, up there, do you see it?" said Ross, but Zero simply shushed him with his hand.
Up ahead, from another clearing, an old man with a very, very large nose approached them. "Why, he just a harmless old man," said Ross. But Zero wasn't so convinced, and neither was Crimebot, who had searched his massive database for any mention of "big nose+forest". After ignoring literally thousands of pornographic returns, he found one that was slighty more disturbing. "Careful, it's a tengu!" Crimebot yelled, shooting it in the face with a laser. However, the laser seemed only to scuff the tengu's titanium mask, and the beast was clearly made angry as it reverted to its lumbering goblin form and charged at Crimebot. Leaping out of the way with a full jolt from his jetpack, the tengu stumbled and missed. Next, it was Ross' turn. He shot the tengu in the chest with his pistol, but the tengu only seemed mildly fazed, and charged at Ross. Ross leapt out of the way with a full jolt from his legs, and the tengu rammed into a tree and fell down.
The fight continued in this vein for a couple of minutes, and although it seemed the tengu was a really awful fighter, it also seemed he was impervious to their mundane attacks. Crimebot and Ross did not know what to do, and so they climbed a tree and hope the tengu would go away. But the tengu did not go away! It stayed at the base of the tree, waiting for its prey to come down so he could presumably eat them or do something odd with his nose.
Finally, after an hour of waiting for dramatic effect, Zero Caspian offered to help. He kicked the tengu in its bottom, and when it turned around to rush him, he made a wall of ice that the tengu smashed headlong into. "Of course! Everyone knows Goblins can't stand ice! Why didn't I think of that?" yelled Crimebot from his lofty perch.
Zero Caspian danced around, kicking the tengu in its bottom then making it smash into walls for a little while, then he froze it solid in and in doing so also turned it into a beautiful ice sculpture. "There friends, a little taste of what I can do," Zero said, with a laugh. Then he froze a beautiful set of stairs for Crimebot and Ross to walk down.
"Thanks for the help, Zero Caspian," said Ross.
"Please, call me Zero," replied Zero.
"Well, thanks Zero. That tengu thing was really tough," replied Ross, "I don't know if we could have taken it on our own," he finished.
"What are friends for?" laughed Zero.
Our three intrepid heroes then moved on, with Zero leading the way and Crimebot and Ross following behind as he moved faster and faster, following some unseen path deeper and deeper into the wilderness...
He opened his robotic mouth to speak, but was cut off by Zero Caspian. "Please, fair robot," said Zero Caspian, "I know you have many questions. Let me just say this, and then we shall say no more: I have come from a faraway land to help you, so that one day many days from now, you will be able to help me. The object you seek is an important artefact indeed, and one that will perhaps even save the very world we live on!" Crimebot attempted to speak again, but again Zero cut him off, "No more, time is crucial! Foul beasts live in these woods, and we must hurry out of them. Your question and/or comments would only slow us down!" and with that, he leapt to his feet and walked briskly over to the edge of the glade they were in. If I didn't mention they were in a glade earlier, they are.
Or were, technically, as now they quickly moved away from it down a narrow path. Crimebot had lost the set of tracks he was following when he had become entraced by Zero Caspian's beautiful singing voice, and so now he was following the tall half-elf quickly with Ross a half-step behind.
Just then, they came to an abrupt halt. "Wait," said Zero Caspian, "I smell danger!"
"I do not sense any danger," said Crimebot, unable to sense any danger.
"Look, up there, do you see it?" said Ross, but Zero simply shushed him with his hand.
Up ahead, from another clearing, an old man with a very, very large nose approached them. "Why, he just a harmless old man," said Ross. But Zero wasn't so convinced, and neither was Crimebot, who had searched his massive database for any mention of "big nose+forest". After ignoring literally thousands of pornographic returns, he found one that was slighty more disturbing. "Careful, it's a tengu!" Crimebot yelled, shooting it in the face with a laser. However, the laser seemed only to scuff the tengu's titanium mask, and the beast was clearly made angry as it reverted to its lumbering goblin form and charged at Crimebot. Leaping out of the way with a full jolt from his jetpack, the tengu stumbled and missed. Next, it was Ross' turn. He shot the tengu in the chest with his pistol, but the tengu only seemed mildly fazed, and charged at Ross. Ross leapt out of the way with a full jolt from his legs, and the tengu rammed into a tree and fell down.
The fight continued in this vein for a couple of minutes, and although it seemed the tengu was a really awful fighter, it also seemed he was impervious to their mundane attacks. Crimebot and Ross did not know what to do, and so they climbed a tree and hope the tengu would go away. But the tengu did not go away! It stayed at the base of the tree, waiting for its prey to come down so he could presumably eat them or do something odd with his nose.
Finally, after an hour of waiting for dramatic effect, Zero Caspian offered to help. He kicked the tengu in its bottom, and when it turned around to rush him, he made a wall of ice that the tengu smashed headlong into. "Of course! Everyone knows Goblins can't stand ice! Why didn't I think of that?" yelled Crimebot from his lofty perch.
Zero Caspian danced around, kicking the tengu in its bottom then making it smash into walls for a little while, then he froze it solid in and in doing so also turned it into a beautiful ice sculpture. "There friends, a little taste of what I can do," Zero said, with a laugh. Then he froze a beautiful set of stairs for Crimebot and Ross to walk down.
"Thanks for the help, Zero Caspian," said Ross.
"Please, call me Zero," replied Zero.
"Well, thanks Zero. That tengu thing was really tough," replied Ross, "I don't know if we could have taken it on our own," he finished.
"What are friends for?" laughed Zero.
Our three intrepid heroes then moved on, with Zero leading the way and Crimebot and Ross following behind as he moved faster and faster, following some unseen path deeper and deeper into the wilderness...
posted by Andrew Spittal at 12:47 AM
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