Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Friendly Foes

Crimebot let go of the man's neck. As the metal man's grip relaxed, Thaddius Marshall fell to the ground with a thud. Crimebot's eyes lit up, more than normal. "Tell me where my friends are, or I'll squeeze out your brain juices and then use as lubrication for my arm joints, then I'll use my newly lubricated arms to bash in your chest cavity!"
Thaddius quaked in fear and nearly pooped his pants. Thaddius Marshall, a known informant, was stuck between a rock and a hard place. On one hand, he had Dr. Julius Brench's very stern warning not to give any information out about him, and on the other hand, he had a giant machine built to serve and protect. What had his especially worried, though, was that this particular machine had a reputation for serving and protecting by brutally beating and possibly defenstrating those who he viewed as criminals. "Listen man," he began, but was quickly cut off by Crimebot.
"I do not want your pathetic drivel! Give me the information I seek or it's curtains for you!" Crimebot shouted. Thaddius gulped.
"What kind of curtains?" he then asked.
"I don't know, what kind to they use at funeral homes?" Crimebot replied.
Thaddius thought for a moment, then said "Satin, I think," which made Crimebot's eyes light up a little.
"Then it'll be those kinds of curtains!" he shouted loudly, right into Thaddius' face, spitting oil.
"Alright, alright," Thaddius replied, "I'll take you to the old warehouse where they're lodged up."
"And it won't be a trap?" Crimebot inquired.
"Yeah, yeah, possibly. Maybe it is, but what do you have to lose?" Thaddius shot back, cockily.
"Nothing... but my life!!!" screamed Crimebot, punching Thaddius in the face so hard it knocked him out.

When Thaddius awoke, it was dark and raining. He found some shelter in the banged up old car he had been placed in. Though the windows had long been smashed by gangsters or kids hopped up on drugs, or maybe a guy who hates windows, I don't know and it doesn't really matter. Anyways, the point is that there were no windows, but a roof, and the roof kept at least a little rain off his back. He looked around, and he eyes quickly became adjusted to the dark outside. He was in the Steel Nest, there was no doubt about it. The Steel Nest was an old disused scrap yard, chock full of broken down old cars with windows smashed by the same mysterious and irrelevant hoodlums that had smashed his car's. The Steel Nest was also home to the Metal Ravens, one of the most dangerous gang of street punks around. They were led by their leader (obviously), Iron Crow, [despite the fact that a crow is a lesser animal than a raven in my opinion.] who as ruthless as he was without ruth. That is to say, very. Thaddius was in trouble, and deep in it, too. If the Metal Ravens found him hanging out in their turf, they'd most likely kill him, or at least rough him up a lot. He scrambled out of the car into the open. The rain beat down on his face, and he wished he had an umbrella. He heard a noise through the rain, and darted inside a burn-out husk of a truck. Several men walked by him, straight up the car and looked inside. Thank goodness, Thaddius thought, he woke up just in time. The men exchanged some words in the pig-Mandarin typical to these parts. Thaddius didn't understand it because he spoke only two languages: English and street. After a moment, three of the four men who had walked by him initially left the scene, leaving one man behind who was trying without success to light a cigarette. Finally, just as got it lit, a deadly karate chop slammed into the man's neck, exploding an artery and causing him to die. Thaddius grabbed the cigarette from the man's hand as he crumbled to the ground, took one long drag, then walked away. After a couple steps, he's dramtically turned and flicked the cigarette at the man, who burst into flames, because apparently he was covered in gasoline.

Thaddius slowly snaked his way through the compound, using his street-wise martial arts skills to hack and chop his way to freedom. As he reached the fence surrounding the compound, he saw several dozen guards appear. They all started rushing at him, when suddenly the fence behind him was torn asunder and a metal arm grabbed him, and he was carried away quickly to safety. Crimebot chortled robotically. "So, you thought you could escape me by seeking the protection of the Metal Ravens, eh? What a foolish plan it was to hang out so near the exterior of the compound!" Thaddius began to object, but Crimebot cut him off. "After I knocked you out, I thought I killed you so I went to get a doctor. When I came back, you were gone! I thought you had ran off, but after some searching I learned that the Metal Ravens had taken you in as to protect you from me, because they hate me so much. A clever ploy, making alliances with my enemies before even meeting me!"

Thaddius was dumbfounded. He must have killed 15 Metal Ravens during his presumed escape. Resigning himself to his own stupidity, he asked Crimebot a serious qustion. "What now?"
Crimebot informed him gladly, saying "You take me to that warehouse, I rescue my friends, and you get off scot-free. Now let's go!" And so, Thaddius and Crimebot rolled rapidly towards the Warehouse, and at least one of them was unaware of the terrible fate that was in store for them...

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