Deep X
Crimebot's flashlight shone on the map in Ross' hand.
"According to this map, there should be a large cavern just around this corner," Ross said.
"Which corner? This one?" asked Max.
"No Max, we just came around that corner. This corner here, in front of us," Ross replied.
"How do you know it's not this one? It could be this one!" Max said, heatedly.
"Because we just came around that corner and there was no large cavern behind it!" yelled Ross.
This argument went on in a silimar vein for about ten minutes, at which point Ross tripped over a rock and tumbled around the corner and into the cavern. Don't ask me how he tumbled around a 90 degree turn, he just did.
"It's empty," said Crimebot, who was standing in the cavern and had checked it thoroughly while Ross and Max argued. Ross suddenly realised he and Max had been standing in the pitch black for the entire argument, Crimebot's flashlight/holoprojector/siren being the only source of light in the cave.
"So this has just been a big, fat waste of time? Like filling out your intertaxes or voting in the Corporation sponsored elections?" asked Max.
"And now we're trapped, like hats on a rack?" yelled Ross angrily.
"Not entirely," said Crimebot, who gestured his friends over to the center of the room. "Look at the dirt on the ground, here. There was something in here very recently, and I'd say someone must have beat us down here. Which means..." Crimebot continued, but was cut off.
"Which means that the farmhouse wasn't a house at all, but a living, breathing octopus!" yelled Max.
"No, Max, it means that there is another way out," said Ross, "And one which we have to find!"
Crimebot detected some footprints in the ground leading from the chest. "Follow me, chums," he said to his chums, intoning that they should follow him. Within minutes, they were standing on the other side of the mountain range they had entered an indiscriminate length of time earlier. Not utterly lost, they stumbled around in the dark (except Crimebot who could see perfectly well in the dark and was just stumbling around because he wanted to feel like part of the group) for about an hour before spotting some lights in the distance.
"A house?" asked Ross.
"A hose?" asked Max.
The three companions decided to take a closer look. Nearing the light, they realised it was a campfire, surrounded by some tents. Walking around the makeshift camp were some surly looking men with guns slung over their shoulders. "Do you think those are the guys who took whatever was in that cave?" asked Ross, which made Crimebot's servos whirr in thought.
"It's possible," he said, "But we don't even know what it was, and they don't look like the type who would tell us."
Max guffawed. "We don't need to ask! We can just sneak in, steal all of their belongings, then sort through them and take out all the uncommon items, then by a process of elimination we can determine which is the most unusual. That will probably be what they took! Then we can return all their other belongings and none will be the wiser, until they notice their precious item is missing, at which point they'll hunt us down. But we'll be long gone!"
Ross shook his head, and said "Although that's a sound plan, I think we should let Crimebot decide what we should do. After all, he is the one trained in hostile mediation!"
Crimebot bleeped and whirred and made some other noises before finally saying anything. "We must arrest them all, and then threaten to throw the book at them if they refuse to answer our questions!" he said at long last.
Ross was confused. "Which book?" he asked.
Crimebot smiled a robot smile and replied "The only book I've ever cared to read. The book of international justice and law, of morality and ethics. The Nomologos!"
Ross and Max had never heard of this book, but they assumed that Crimebot probably wasn't lying about it's existence or contents.
Without another word, our three brave heroes lay down and wait for the perfect moment to strike the camp full of probably criminals and arrest them all for questioning. When that time came, the ensuing battle would be frought with peril. It would be a battle so perilous, that perhaps one of the heroes may even die, gruesomely, never to live again.
Anyways, the three heroes lay on the cliff overlooking the camp, and waited for the perfect opportunity to rush down the cliffside into danger...
"According to this map, there should be a large cavern just around this corner," Ross said.
"Which corner? This one?" asked Max.
"No Max, we just came around that corner. This corner here, in front of us," Ross replied.
"How do you know it's not this one? It could be this one!" Max said, heatedly.
"Because we just came around that corner and there was no large cavern behind it!" yelled Ross.
This argument went on in a silimar vein for about ten minutes, at which point Ross tripped over a rock and tumbled around the corner and into the cavern. Don't ask me how he tumbled around a 90 degree turn, he just did.
"It's empty," said Crimebot, who was standing in the cavern and had checked it thoroughly while Ross and Max argued. Ross suddenly realised he and Max had been standing in the pitch black for the entire argument, Crimebot's flashlight/holoprojector/siren being the only source of light in the cave.
"So this has just been a big, fat waste of time? Like filling out your intertaxes or voting in the Corporation sponsored elections?" asked Max.
"And now we're trapped, like hats on a rack?" yelled Ross angrily.
"Not entirely," said Crimebot, who gestured his friends over to the center of the room. "Look at the dirt on the ground, here. There was something in here very recently, and I'd say someone must have beat us down here. Which means..." Crimebot continued, but was cut off.
"Which means that the farmhouse wasn't a house at all, but a living, breathing octopus!" yelled Max.
"No, Max, it means that there is another way out," said Ross, "And one which we have to find!"
Crimebot detected some footprints in the ground leading from the chest. "Follow me, chums," he said to his chums, intoning that they should follow him. Within minutes, they were standing on the other side of the mountain range they had entered an indiscriminate length of time earlier. Not utterly lost, they stumbled around in the dark (except Crimebot who could see perfectly well in the dark and was just stumbling around because he wanted to feel like part of the group) for about an hour before spotting some lights in the distance.
"A house?" asked Ross.
"A hose?" asked Max.
The three companions decided to take a closer look. Nearing the light, they realised it was a campfire, surrounded by some tents. Walking around the makeshift camp were some surly looking men with guns slung over their shoulders. "Do you think those are the guys who took whatever was in that cave?" asked Ross, which made Crimebot's servos whirr in thought.
"It's possible," he said, "But we don't even know what it was, and they don't look like the type who would tell us."
Max guffawed. "We don't need to ask! We can just sneak in, steal all of their belongings, then sort through them and take out all the uncommon items, then by a process of elimination we can determine which is the most unusual. That will probably be what they took! Then we can return all their other belongings and none will be the wiser, until they notice their precious item is missing, at which point they'll hunt us down. But we'll be long gone!"
Ross shook his head, and said "Although that's a sound plan, I think we should let Crimebot decide what we should do. After all, he is the one trained in hostile mediation!"
Crimebot bleeped and whirred and made some other noises before finally saying anything. "We must arrest them all, and then threaten to throw the book at them if they refuse to answer our questions!" he said at long last.
Ross was confused. "Which book?" he asked.
Crimebot smiled a robot smile and replied "The only book I've ever cared to read. The book of international justice and law, of morality and ethics. The Nomologos!"
Ross and Max had never heard of this book, but they assumed that Crimebot probably wasn't lying about it's existence or contents.
Without another word, our three brave heroes lay down and wait for the perfect moment to strike the camp full of probably criminals and arrest them all for questioning. When that time came, the ensuing battle would be frought with peril. It would be a battle so perilous, that perhaps one of the heroes may even die, gruesomely, never to live again.
Anyways, the three heroes lay on the cliff overlooking the camp, and waited for the perfect opportunity to rush down the cliffside into danger...
posted by Andrew Spittal at 6:17 PM
0 comments
